When I first started this blog and was trying to figure out what I’d fill it with (still working on that), I briefly thought of making it parenting-related since that’s been the major focus of my life for the past 12 years. But then I started thinking that the stories of my kids weren’t really my stories to tell, and I didn’t want to turn our personal moments into content. Today, I’m taking the liberty of sharing one of these personal moments because as much as it is about my child, it’s also about me, her mother.
My oldest child officially turns 12 in a little over an hour. The day’s been spent with the usual birthday festivities: special breakfast, presents, special dinner, more presents, cake, and staying up late. I don’t know why this birthday feels so different to me, but it does. I think I’m hyper aware of how fast time is moving now that we’ve rolled into a second decade together by more than one year. Twelve years is a long time, but as I look back at the tens of thousands of moments I’ve captured on film — as I did today — it all just feels like pages in a flip book.
When my daughter was a newborn, strangers would randomly approach me and caution that time moved very quickly with children. “Enjoy her now. It all goes by so fast.” At the time I knew they were probably right, but now I understand how they were right. I was so focused on what was ahead of us in terms of milestones — things we could leave behind, check off a list, or worry about — or so focused on the daily filler that I lost track of time in the sense of it actually passing.
And now we’re at 12. And she is lovely. And I wish time would cooperate.